CeeCee is an older mare, somewhere in the range of 20 years old. She is a broodmare and appears to have been one for a number of years.
She came to the barn a little over a year ago from her former owner who needed to find her a home. What I first noticed about her was how she clearly didn't want anything to do with me but it was clear that she knew better than to argue.
From the moment she arrived viewed me with suspicion and when I would go near her she would immediately walk away. Right away she struck a chord in my heart as do all of the underdogs.
The other two mares that came in with her were more compliant and very sweet. What made her stand out to me was her spirit. At first glance, her appearance is unremarkable--a sorrel, with okay conformation but the years have been hard on her and she is very crippled up in both her front end and hindquarters. Her pedigree is impressive and I am sure she was a riding horse of substantial talent in her day.
Every time I have brought her in to the barn to have her hooves trimmed she was clearly unhappy and had a very short time limit before she became antsy and made it clear that she wanted to leave.
It was hoof trimming day yesterday and I brought her and a buddy in. She was very uncomfortable due to the tight tendons in her rear end and was protesting about lifting her hind legs. Thankfully our farrier is very much in tune with the horses and was very sensitive to how she was feeling.
My normal reaction would be to grab the rope and hold the horse still but for some strange reason I listened to my instinct and instead placed a light hand on either side of her neck and just calmly stood with her.
What happened in that moment makes me rather emotional. She was completely shut down. You could see it in her eyes and when I took a moment to not only trust her but to comfort and respect her, a miracle happened.
Her eyes changed and with it, her demeanour. She instantly settled in spite of her discomfort and became calm. She allowed the farrier to work on her hooves in short spurts instead of fighting. I left her side to grab a shovel and the instant I did so, her head came up, and she began looking for me and whinnying even though her buddy was right beside her.
I returned to her and she instantly nuzzled me, resting her head against my face and blowing into my nostrils. I immediately placed my hands back on her neck and watched her instantly calm down. Every time I had to walk away she would repeat the same behaviour, acting all worried and calling me and on my return she would rest her face against mine.
I was given a huge gift. The trust of a creature who in an instant decided to come out of a state of self preservation and open herself up to receive the love that I offered. I believe that in the moment that I didn't try to restrain her and chose to comfort her it broke down her last defence. That day, CeeCee was shown respect by two human beings and it was her undoing. I don't take what she did lightly.
This little mare has reminded me that sometimes we need to love and respect others in spite of themselves and to leave them the choice to either run or stay.
I have been making some observations about the horses in the past few days.
I brought in two horses who are very special to me last night to get their feet trimmed. One of them used to be very uptight and high headed when I would bring him in.
The other one, a sweet mare, used to fuss and carry on the entire time she was inside.
Last night they were both calm, low headed and I could tell that they felt completely safe where they were. The gelding, who would get all uptight and worried when I stood near his "riding zone" on his body, last night pressed his barrel against my stomach and leaned in to me relaxed while I gently leaned against him, his eyes soft and his head low.
The mare seemed uncomfortable and was standing with her hind legs way underneath her.
I massaged an old injury site, breaking down her scar tissue. She handed me her leg so I could really get at it. I stretched out both of her hind legs and pulled her tail. After I was finished she stood all relaxed with her hind legs in normal position. It was interesting how she "spoke" to me and I listened, helping her.
Today, Nugget, the new guy was feeling anxious when he was getting his feet trimmed. I observed how he rested his head against me and instantly calmed down when I was beside him.
Story who is usually fidgety and difficult when her feet are being done, stood calm and quiet, resting her head against me when I came and stood near her.
I love that these horses all view me as their safety. I am thrilled that when I am around them, they feel drawn to my energy and that they can feel its soft, gentleness. They can truly feel my love and it is so amazing.
They are such amazing creatures.
There is nothing quite as humbling as being around equines. They continue to amaze, surprise and uplift me day after day.
A new horse has come into my care; his name is Nugget. He comes from a loving home, however due to circumstances he couldn't stay in his current living arrangement and his owner only wants the very best for him. He has been with me for just over a week and I cannot believe the progress he and I have made.
The first day I met him, I remembered the advice that I always give to others. To not set him up to fail and to have a completely open mind with him. Every single day, he shows me what a hidden gem he is.
He loaded in the trailer with only brief hesitation. This horse hasn't seen the inside of a horse trailer in over a decade. It actually didn't surprise me because whenever you assume a horse will or won't do something, they almost always surprise you.
He has gone from being herd bound and disassociated, to showing me what a huge heart he has. He is very smart and willing, a true gentleman.
He used to walk away from me when I went in his pen and now he waits at the gate for me. He used to rear and balk when he got to the barn door, now he enters willingly. He tried to walk over top of me, now he maintains a respectful distance. He only has to be told something once and he is immediately respectful and compliant.
Last night I tried a little experiment with him. I stood at his shoulder, and slowly backed up. He matched me step for step. I did everything with him at liberty, which means he could have run off at any moment. We ended up doing a very neat little mimicking dance together. He was bright and engaged and I can see how willing to please and kind he is. In taking the time to get to know him and allow him to settle in and feel comfortable, we are forming a relationship of mutual respect.
Because he hasn't been put into use for a long time, he and I have been doing lots of ground exercises and stretching, backing and getting him back in tune with his body.
He is a senior citizen, somewhere around 20 years old or maybe slightly younger, so I am taking extra time with him as I don't want to stress him unduly. In a short week, he has made real progress physically. In the beginning when he was disengaging his hindquarters, he wasn't able to cross his hind feet without literally stepping on himself. Last night, I was able to get him to cross over on both sides. His left hind leg was very trembly when I lifted it to clean his hooves and I am already noticing that it is improving and loosening up.
He is stunningly beautiful and very well put together. He has a huge, graceful floaty trot. He does have a swayed back, but I believe as he gains muscle and a topline, most of it will be gone. He has huge bone and great feet, a huge muscled hindquarter and a very nice head and neck. He is a registered appaloosa, although you would never know it looking at him. He is a dark golden palomino and has 3 or 4 small white spots on his body.
Once he has some regularly scheduled maintenance done, I will do a riding assessment on him but I am in no rush. I will post more on his progress once we are farther along.
There is that moment of magic between horse and human when the horse feels safe and trusting enough to want your touch.
I had that moment happen with my little mare Story about a week ago. I went to see her and took a moment to rub her under her jaw.
Up until that point she has submitted to touch but hasn't enjoyed it.
I noticed a change in her right away. She leaned into my hand and her eyes softened. She stood there quietly, enjoying the affection that I was there to offer. When I moved my hands to the top of her head, she stood quietly still, just enjoying the attention.
To me it was a huge breakthrough for her. She is giving me her trust inch by inch. It so rewarding to see how far she has come in the past 2 years.
Right from the moment she arrived, I instinctively knew that this was a horse who just needed time, something that is precious and important.
Some horses can be turned around in a very short time, but with others due to circumstance you need to earn it. I have had a few of these types and once they trust you, you have an amazing relationship. A bond stronger than most.
I know that it comes down to dollars and cents for people so many times horses are discarded because they haven't come around quickly enough. It really makes me sad.
When I go out with the herd, I spend lots of time gently touching their faces. What I have observed is how much they actually like it. I use very light pressure and massage their entire head, even their nostrils and gums. It's really neat to watch them lower their heads and now they will come up and rest their faces up against me and just stand all quiet.
I love going out and spending time with them, no agenda in mind other than being there. It is such a peaceful and wonderful experience. The only sounds are the odd sneeze or the birds singing in the distance. These moments are magical. They take turns coming up to greet me, most of them moving on after a few moments. Some come over specifically just to stand near and touch me with their noses. It is a great feeling to be chosen as their place of comfort.
It feel so lucky to have the honour of being in the midst of these amazing creatures who continue to amaze me and to fill my heart. They are such a gift.
Last night I went out and spent some time with the mares and foals.
For me there is nothing more calming than to be in the midst of a herd of horses. I'm sure that strikes terror in the heart of some people but I have been around them all my life and being in their presence brings me so much peace.
I haven't been able to spend as much time with the wee ones lately due to travel so I made a point of getting out and spending some time with them. All three of them came to greet me and have a nibble. One was pulling on the straps of my top, one was chewing my hair and one was giving me kisses.
I love how friendly they are with everyone who comes out to see them. They all leave their momma's side to greet visitors. One little guy will even run across the field to say hello. So adorable! Being around them just warms my heart.
I especially have a soft spot for one little guy who was all crooked and twisted at birth. He and I bonded when I had to give him antibiotics and massage and stretch his poor little contracted tendons. I am so pleased to say that he has dramatically straightened up and should turn out just fine. Oh the resilience of youth!
They are all growing like weeds and I will be weaning them near the end of October.
Years ago, when my dear friend was sick, she told me that I had to take over being their "mom" when she could no longer do so. It was a very difficult and sad moment and I was honoured and touched that she trusted me to take over the job. They hold such a special place in my heart as do their dams. I have known these mares for 10 years and have raised a few crops of their foals, not to mention I own a few of the babies.
They have taught me so much and continue to teach me all the time. Hours spent with the herd, observing their subtle and silent communication is such a gift.
It is truly amazing how strong and resilient horses are. A strong survival instinct coupled with the malleability of youth can make all the difference.
I know a foal who was born this spring that many would have written off. He so big and his dam had a very tough delivery. Due to his large size, the poor little guy was twisted and completely exhausted from his difficult entry into the world.
A team of very dedicated people worked tirelessly to give the little fella a chance by lifting him to his feet, milking his mom and syringe feeding him until he was strong enough to stand on his own four legs.
Without this help he would not have pulled through.
It has taken time and lots of care but this little guy is thriving. He ended up with a nasty case of foal diarrhea, so his introduction to me was to receive a needle every day as he needed antibiotics to clear it up. From his time of not being mobile he developed a huge bed sore which is close to being healed. He had a very crooked rear pastern and we have had to do some corrective farrier work which has helped tremendously. He also had very contracted tendons in the front. Luckily because he has been handled so much, he allowed me to stretch and massage his front legs. He would lay down and allow me to stretch and rub him and massage his crooked little spine.
What I have noticed is that the youngsters develop a real body awareness and I see that he now stretches his own forelegs when he is napping and as a result, they have straightened dramatically.
He has been bathed and handled quite a lot and we introduced essential oils to calm him in the beginning. He now loves them and almost goes to sleep the second I bring them near. I have yet to halter him as I don't believe that it is something that needs to be rushed, however, when we need to work on his feet, he only requires a light touch on his neck to hold him still.
He moves away from gentle pressure and is such a good little guy.
A lot of people would have written him off but I am sure glad that they didn't. He is growing into a beautiful and strong young horse and I look forward to watching him continue to thrive and become an amazing partner to someone.
Just what can a horse teach you?
Well, they can teach you infinite lessons, you just have to sharpen your senses and pay very close attention to them.
They speak very loudly if you know how to listen.
They have taught me to watch and listen closely as far more is said by what is not actually verbalized. Because horses are very subtle creatures you have to rely on viewing the smallest of gestures and movements that they use to communicate.
It has also taught me to be more aware of the subtleties of human body language as well, not only in the message that I convey to the horse or other people but also to the messages that I receive from the people around me.
So much is said in the world by what is not said.
I am still learning so much each and every day that I am with these magnificent animals. They are the most amazing teachers.
In working with so many different horses, you have to learn how each of them communicate. Although similar they do have subtle differences between them. I rely on my intuition when I work with them as well and it is a great tool.
They have taught me to let go of my day, and just be present. You can't work with a flight animal when you are all tense and worried about something else. They will feed off of you and you will open yourself up to injury simply because your edginess will be passed on to them.
They have taught me that you can't win a fight with someone who outweighs you by 1,000 LBS. If they want to win, they will win. Instead you need to respect them and in turn teach them to respect you.
Many horses are disrespectful, pushing themselves into your space, turning their rump toward you or in some cases completely ignoring your presence which can be very dangerous. It is vitally important to remind them that they must stay out of your space unless you invite them in. And in that vein, when you are working with a horse, your full attention should be on the horse, not on everything else that is going on around you. Your safety depends on it because horses are very reactive and should something frighten them, their first instinct is to flee. If you are busy texting someone or daydreaming, you may be laying under a set of hooves.
They have taught me to be more compassionate and to recognize the subtle signs when they are not okay. They hide their pain and discomfort unless it is really severe. I check in with my horses before a ride to see if they are acting normal. There are days as well, where they are in a mood that is not conducive to going for a ride. If you disregard the signs, there is usually an issue or a wreck coming. I know that every time I have disregarded my horse's signs, I have paid in one way or another.
It has made a huge difference in my life. This body awareness has transformed who I am out in the world and in my everyday life.
And many people say it's just a hobby...
